1. |
Balls, Balls, Balls
03:26
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Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls (repeat)
We'll hang our balls on the Christmas tree
We'll hang our balls on the Christmas tree
Let's hang our balls on the Christmas tree
Let's hang our balls on the Christmas tree
We'll hang our balls on the Christmas tree
Let's hang our balls on the Christmas tree
It'll really be a fun Christmasy kinda thing like
We'll hang our balls on the Christmas tree
We got red balls, green balls
Hang 'em on the Christmas tree
Pink balls, brown balls
Hang 'em on the Christmas tree
Look Dad, Mum got a present for you
A pair of balls that are big and blue
We'll hang our balls on the Christmas tree
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls (repeat)
We'll hang our balls on the Christmas tree
Dad'll hang his balls on the Christmas tree
I'll hang my balls on the Christmas tree
Brother'll hang his balls on the Christmas tree
Dad went out and cut down that tree
And it looks nice when it's plain and green
But it is prettier than anything I've seen
When there's some balls on the Christmas tree
Father Murphy is coming to our house
He'll bring us some salvation
He'll say a prayer, he'll bless the tree
And he got a couple balls just for decoration
Hang his balls on the Christmas tree
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls (repeat)
We'll have a ball hanging balls on the Christmas tree
have a ball hanging balls on the Christmas tree
have a ball hanging balls on the Christmas tree
have a ball hanging balls on the Christmas tree
Don't break my balls, just put 'em on the tree
Don't crush my balls just put 'em on the tree
But you can squeeze my balls if you put 'em on that tree
We'll hang our balls on the Christmas tree
Dad just had his tenth eggnog
His pants just fell down
He tripped and fell, and took the tree with him
And it all came tumbling down and he said
"Ow! Them pine needles pinch... my balls on the Christmas tree"
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls
Balls balls balls (repeat)
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2. |
Santa Claus is Drunk
03:09
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Who's that staggering on the roof
Eggnog spiked with 100 proof
It's Christmas eve and I'm awake in my bunk
'Cause Santa Claus is drunk
"ho ho ho where the hell's the chimey in this damn place? Hate this job!"
I saw Santa at the mall
I wanted to ask him for a new football
I sat on his lap and he really stunk
Santa Claus is drunk
"Ho ho ho what do you want from me Timmy? Whatever, next!"
He's got presents for the girls and boys
I hope he doesn't drop his sack and break my toys
And under the tree I'll find a pile of junk
'Cause Santa Claus was drunk
"Goddamn bag's too heavy. Why don't one of you deer carry it?"
Ho ho ho, who would of known?
Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go
Up on the housetop, sip sip sip
Down with the whiskey is drunk St. Nick
"Yeah real funny, you should be on TV, damn comedian, ho ho"
Christmas Eve comes once a year
But Santa can't lay off the beer "I could if I wanted to"
He fell on the tree and he snapped the trunk
Santa Claus is drunk
"Ho ho ho. Milk and cookies? What the hell's this? Where's the damn bourbon in this house?"
I saw Santa fly away
With his eight reindeer and his Christmas sleigh
He crashed into a lake and down the sleigh sunk
Santa Claus is drunk
"Jesus Christ that's my third DUI"
Santa Claus is drunk!
"And you would be too if you had my job"
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3. |
Irish Christmas
01:57
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Hey it's skurbin gurbin Santa
And skurbin manurbin reindeer
And skurbin gurbin Christmas in Tralee
And it's skip to me diddle o' stockings
And Johnny McEldoo O' presents
It's an Irish Christmas this year!
I got bows in me sheleighly
And skurbin gurbin bourbon
And elves and leprechauns around the tree
I got whiskey in me eggnog
And skurbin manurbin yuletide
It's an Irish Christmas this year!
I gave Santa milk and cookies
But he wanted Irish stout
Fine stout!
Oh and a one horse open skurbin
And skip to me Jesus birthday
It's an Irish Christmas this year!
Aye we tora lora Rudolph
And skurbin manurbin chestnuts
And skip to me diddle o' jingle all the way
And it's blarney on the yule log
And skurbin mistletoe
It's an Irish Christmas this year!
I gave Santa milk and cookies
But he wanted Irish stout
Fine stout!
Oh and a one horse open skurbin
And skip to me Jesus birthday
It's an Irish Christmas this year!
It's an Irish Christmas this year!
It's an Irish Christmas this year!
Oh Skurbin Christmas every Skurbin!
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4. |
I Hate People
01:54
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"Well hello everybody, welcome to open mic night at Jacob's Nightclub, the hottest spot in town. Ha ha. Thanks. First up tonight we have a man with a rather odd name. His name is Ebeneezer Scrooge. Is that right? Is that pronounced correctly? Ok, alright, give him a hand everybody. He's going to do a couple tunes for you."
Hi thank you. Hi. I wrote this song about people. Here it goes.
I hate people
I hate people
Sitting on their miserable asses looking at me with their glasses
I hate people!
They're so stupid they are dumb, I hate people I hate bums
I hate people!
I like to throw rocks at them, I really hate them, I really hate them
They are ugly!
I get drunk, I puke on their shoes, I hate people, I hate you
I hate people!
"You suck!"
I hate that guy!
Interrupting my great song, he probably doesn't have a dong
I hate people!
Always asking me for money, then I kick them and it's funny
I like to kick them!
Especially if they are babies I just hope they don't have rabies
I hate people!
I hate people!
I hate people
And I don't care if they hate me
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5. |
Feliz Navidad N'at
02:42
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6. |
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Yinz know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen
Comet and Cupid and Blitzen and Bob
But do yinz recall the awesomest reindeer of all?
Donnie the Yinzer Reindeer
Lived up the North Pole
One of his antlers was black
And the other one was gold
All of the other reindeer
Like the Cowboys and Browns
So Donnie left them losers
And moved to his favorite town
Now Donnie lived in Pittsburgh
In the woods in Schenley Park
Hung out at the O in the daytime
Watched out for Cordell after dark
He went to Steeler home games
He liked to tailgate in the cold
But he could not find a job
Cause there were no sleds to pull
Then one foggy Super Bowl eve
Cowher came to say (and he spit on him)
Donnie we're snowed in tonight
Take us to the super bowl in a sleigh tonight
Then all the Steeler s loved him
He took them to victory
And all of the other reindeer
Were turned into reindeer meat
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7. |
Meckalacacamaca
03:09
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8. |
Holy Crap It's Christmas
01:19
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9. |
Looks Like Santa Claus
02:06
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10. |
Christmas Slay
02:56
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Sloover Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
I was born in Pittsburgh, PA. I started to play guitar at 10 years old. In the mid 90s I formed a surf band at Indiana University of PA called Captain Bigwheel. After college we moved to Chapel Hill NC in 2000 and morphed into Buzzsawyer. I recorded Xmas N'at in Nov-Dec 2002. Me and my friends Abe and Ethan started a band in spring 2022 called the Pooks. We practiced a lot. ... more
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